We all love our lives, right? But there is something we love even more, “other’s lives”.
Don’t pretend to disagree, because I know, more than our own life we are intrigued to know the ins and outs of other people’s life. We all hate to be judged but, love to do the same with others. The truth of the matter is, we all judge people all the time.
Anyways, I am not going to debate over here that, “It’s bad to judge people, this and that”, No way, I am in support of judgmental people because I too practice it, but I am an ethical judge. Don’t google it, you will find some bizarre definition. I was just trying to glorify my trait by that adjective. Hehe!
What’s the obvious way of judging someone?
When you encounter someone, you tend to observe many things based on your past experiences or certain preconceived notions; looks, personality, voice, and of course other things which I am shy to mention😊.
They might be better at it or you may be better than them. In either case, you do form an opinion driven by an inferiority complex or superiority complex. The bottom line is; judgement is there.
Well, the case is not extreme all the time. There is one more angle to it. Sometimes when you come across someone, you are highly influenced by them, you admire them and have that urge to learn from them.
These are the most obvious ways of forming an opinion about someone.
But, have you ever questioned that why are we so impatient about forming judgements?
Why do we have to comment instantly on someone?
Or, Is there any need to even judge?
I used to be the one who judged people, not in a derogatory manner, but not very pleasing also ☹. Don’t ask how and when did I begin to change my perspective, because I don’t remember vividly. All I can say is, tiny observations and reflections on my mistakes, probably.
During this journey of change, there were many realizations which struck me, and because I am too generous, let me share the most important one with you. (I know you just judged me as a narcissist😊)
We are judging people the wrong way!
Its simple to look at someone and sum up their life in one meeting. But we need to decipher that a legitimate judgement revolves around many other aspects.
You don’t need know her past, you have seen only that side of her present which she has shown you and you have no idea what her future will be. You don’t know where she comes from, how she has been brought up, so many reasons.
How can we ignore all these considerations and judge someone only based on their present actions? This doesn’t even seem fair.
Life is unfair. Really? No, it’s not.
This is just an excuse we have been giving ourselves for years.
What does it take to show some patience?
Realization. That’s it.
A realization that, like me, even he could have happy, filthy, joyful, miserable experiences.
Like me, he too has a past, he too must be broken at some point of time, he too is a human who is naturally bound to make mistakes.
Your judgements don’t matter to others!
Yes, your judgements don’t matter (unless you are in a legal profession). If you feel that whatever you think, feel whether good or bad matters to someone, well it doesn’t. To form an opinion was your choice, but the other person does hold a great power of accepting or rejecting it.
So, mostly the comments we pass on others isn’t a way of demeaning them, it’s a way of expressing our insecurity disguised as a judgement.
So, the next time you judge someone, ask yourself, what’s my insecurity?
Well, there are several people who get affected by these opinions and judgements, but these are the ones who turn out to be individuals free of insecurities because gradually they don’t let those opinions penetrate within their soul.
When you free yourself from the fear of judgment, you unlock the door to limitless possibilities.
BRING ON THE JUDGMENTS,
I am here to IGNORE!
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